Where Are They Ner? (June 4 - July 9)

Tino Martinez | First Base

Ner from: 1990-1995

Best Ner Moment: While the majority of Tino’s career in Seattle was filled with highlights, his 1995 season was easily the best. Specifically, Martinez’ best moment as a Ner came in Game 3 of the ALDS (against the Yankees, who he would ironically be traded to in the off-season). With Seattle down 2 games and trailing by a run, Tino launched a 2-run dinger in the bottom of the 5th (that’s him rounding the bases above) to put the Ners ahead and spark their incredible 3-game winning streak that propelled them to the ALCS.

Where MM Guessed He is Ner: Despite his success in Seattle, Tino is best remembered as a Yankee. He was a staple of Joe Torre’s dynasty, winning 4 World Series in pinstripes and taking home the crown in the 1997 Home Run Derby. Needless to say, we think he’s living in New York and appears regularly on YES network to reminisce with old teammates Bernie Williams and Paul O’Neil about the “good old days.”

Where He Actually is Ner: After retiring from baseball in 2005, Tino had an embattled stint as the Marlins hitting coach in 2013 before giving up his coaching dreams for good. Now, he spends the majority of his time in Tampa Bay, where he lives with his wife. Tino returned to school in 2011 and earned his Bachelor’s Degree from the University of Tampa, which probably looks nice placed alongside the many trophies he has won at Florida celebrity golf tournaments.

Wily Mo Peña | Outfield

Ner In: 2011

Best Ner Moment: In honor of Ariel Miranda, this “Where Are They Ner” features another former Ner who left Seattle to pursue higher ground in Japan. Yet we’re going to make a slight deviation from the norm in this recurring column, and talk about Wily Mo’s best moment not as a Mariner…but as a Marine – which is only one letter off, but is actually the name of the Chiba Lotte team Peña played for recently in the NPB. Last year, Wily Mo (who was always known for hitting big-time dingers) hit a bomb for the Marines that was estimated to be 550 feet. Holy shit. That is simply gargantuan. M’s fans can watch the video on Youtube – and will find particular enjoyment in both the broadcaster's call and when Peña rounds third base, when the camera catches a good shot of the front of his jersey…with the way the letters fall, it looks like it says “Mariners,” not “Marines.” So truly, this was Wily Mo’s best moment as a Ner.

Where MM Guessed He Is Ner: Given that we haven’t heard all that much from Wily Mo recently, we’re going to guess that he is still in Japan but has suffered from numerous injury setbacks. His role in Chiba Lotte has declined significantly since the 550-foot home run, but the fans still scream when he approaches the plate, in hopes of seeing another Godzilla-like blast.

Where He Actually is Ner: Alas, Wily is currently without a team. He is technically listed as a free agent in the Majors here, but rumor has it he will return to his role as occasional dinger-slapper for Chiba Lotte here soon. Wikipedia describes Peña as “known for long-distance home runs and a high strikeout rate.” Truer words have never been spoken.

Aaron Sele | Starting Pitcher

Ner From: 2000-2001; 2005

Best Ner Moment: Sele, who we’re profiling because he won the Mariners’ 50th game the last time the team won the Wild Card in 2000, represented the team in the All-Star Game that season. It was one of two times Sele made the All-Star Game, and the only of the two games he actually pitched in. In hindsight, it’s a bit jarring to see that the Mariners had three all-stars in 2000: Edgar Martinez, A-Rod and Sele. Nevertheless, Aaron had the best game of the three, throwing a scoreless fourth inning while the other two combined to go 0-for-1. That 2000 season was near the end of Sele’s prime as a MLB pitcher. He had one more good year in 2001 with the 116-win Ners before he tapered off with the Angels and later went 6-12 in his final year with the Mariners. Still, Sele got one hall of fame vote from some kind soul when he went on the ballot in 2013.

Where MM Guessed He Is Ner: Pitching coach. Sele always had this steady demeanor about him that made you feel like you could trust him to deliver a positive result when he took the mound. Seems like the post-career coaching type.

Where He Actually is Ner: Still in baseball, that’s for sure. He’s not exactly a pitching coach anymore, though. Sele retired after spending the 2007 season with the Mets and then joined the Dodgers organization after the 2008 season as a minor league pitching instructor. In 2012, LAD upgraded him to special assistant for player personnel. Aaron stayed with the Dodgers organization for the better part of a decade, leaving the team only after last season. He currently serves as a special assignment scout for the Marlins, which sounds like a really swell gig.

Bryan LaHair | 1B & OF

Ner In: 2008

Best Ner Moment: LaHair only appeared in 45 games in a wildly forgettable 2008 season where he put up an OPS+ of 79 and slashed .250/ .315/.346. However, on September 20th, in game 154 of the season, in a barnburner of a matchup against the Oakland A’s (who weren’t good), he broke out. His only hit on the day was a dinger and he walked his other three times at the plate (once intentionally). He finished with two RBI’s and two runs. His true glory came with the 2012 Cubs, when he somehow made the All-Star game.

Where MM Guessed He Is Ner: If I gleaned anything about Bryan from his Baseball Reference page, its that he’s from Worcester, Massachusetts. Know what they love in Worcester? Hearts. Not kidding, and I’m not talking about the Scottish Football Club based in Gorgie. Worcester is in the middle of the Commonwealth of Massachusetts, and as such, has adopted the heart as the official symbol of the city. After retiring from baseball, Bryan returned home and got involved in the valentine’s card making business, hoping to emulate the success of Esther Howland, who made a valentine’s card empire in the 19th century. Hallmark has not accepted one of his cards yet, but he remains optimistic.

Where He Actually is Ner: Well Bryan, guess you can go ahead and crush my dreams of you penning sappy “I love you’s” in a small store in Worcester. It turns out he is the hitting coach for the Billings Mustangs, the rookie ball affiliate of the Cincinnati Reds. It is his first coaching position in the MLB. Go ‘Stangs.

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