Simsisms of July

By now, you are well aware that we at MM absolutely love Ners broadcaster Dave Sims. He has one of the best spirits in the game, has an extensive knowledge of baseball history, and is a pretty good announcer to boot. But there’s one thing in particular we love about Dave…he has a – well, let’s just call it a “tendency for the obscure.” At least a few times a game, you’re gonna hear something weird come out of Dave’s mouth. We call them “Simsisms,” a tongue-twisting word to label the brain-twisting phrases he lets loose here and there. Every month, MM breaks down the best Simsisms that we heard. We can’t catch them all (if you hear one, please let us know!) but the ones we do catch are normally pretty darn good. The top 5 Simsisms from July are:

#5: July 7

"Mike, I want the sound of that home run as my ringtone."

Crack! New text message for Dave, the sound of which reminds him of when Nelson Cruz hit his 299th home run. Not his 300th – his 299th. Crack!

#4: July 19

"He looks like one of those...big guys...trying to ring the bell with the hammer in the movies."

Dave really struggled to get the words out on this one. He clearly had an image he was trying to illustrate, and he clearly had a reference he was trying to make…but when his attempt to describe Astros’ Evan Gattis somehow landed him on a cinematic lumberjack at a carnival about to hit the high striker...well, he...lost us...completely.

#3: July 23

"Daddy you got me the truck I was looking for!"

I just love it how Dave kicks back and tosses out utterances in attempt to give a little more color to a scene...but which often wind up falling terribly short in their desired impact. This particular one was his way of characterizing the giddiness on Guillermo Heredia’s face as he jumped into Nelson Cruz’ arms after Cruz’ walkoff single against the Yankees. Apparently it was Christmas morning for Guillermo – and apparently Dave Sims always wanted a truck on Christmas.

#4: July 24

"Let him eat!"

As we analyzed last month, Dave has an odd way of creating mic-drop moments with short exclamations. This particular happened as Ben Gamel rounded second and headed for third after roping a line drive down the right field line and trying to stretch it into a triple. Dave got real excited, said this, and then didn’t say anything for about fifteen seconds after Gamel slid in safe to third. Blowers had to cover the mic for a bit while, I’m assuming, Dave caught his breath.

#1: July 9

"I remember in the ’88 Games, when I was watching olympic badminton…that is one hyperspeed sport, man!"

Some of the best Simsisms come during the pre-inning moments when advertisements roll over B-Roll images of…something. Whatever that something is, Dave always feels like he has to comment on it. This badminton comment came as the ROOT camera slowly panned out from a group of people playing the sport at Mercer Island – but it’s not the zeroing in on badminton that caught our eye; it’s the fact that Dave went to the 1988 Olympic games and watched badminton that's most astounding. Badminton!

#Simsisms